Category Archives: Happiness

Learn To Truly Love Yourself

Learn To Truly Love Yourself

 

Most of us are so busy waiting for someone to love us that we’ve forgotten about the one person we need to love first—ourselves. While we’re caught up looking for love from a partner we miss out on receiving love from the one person who has the most amazing love to give. That is the person who stares back at us from the mirror. However you can learn to love yourself unconditionally.

 

love and value yourself

Falling in love with yourself does not have to be loaded with guilt. It’s not selfish when we do it with appreciation. And best of all we discover a source of love that never runs out.

It’s often said that we “can’t expect others to love us if we don’t love ourself first”. While this is true to an extent it’s not the whole picture. Because the reality is, others DO love us even when we don’t love ourself. They see the beauty within us even when we can’t.

When we don’t show ourself genuine love we can very quickly find ourselves caught in a cycle of negativity. Lack of self-confidence, insecurity, jealousy and self-loathing feed off each other and escalate our unhappiness. If we continue in this pattern we begin to push others away. This perpetuates our belief that we are not worthy of love, and reinforces our self-dislike.

Conversely, when we love ourself and treat ourself with kindness and respect we always have someone around who sends us love. We feel more confident, positive, and secure. We draw others to us and we receive even more love from them also.

 

How To Love Yourself

So how do you start falling in love with yourself? The whole idea of turning this concept into a process may seem a bit ridiculous. However, it’s not really so silly.

Engaging in a process of introspection and appreciation makes the process very possible.

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End Of Year Release Ritual

END OF YEAR RELEASE RITUAL

 

2016 is coming to a close and it’s naturally time to reflect back on the year… and start to look forward to 2017. It’s been a heavy year of releasing for many people, a year of endings. As we enter the countdown to 2017 many of us are still holding things that no longer serve us. In order to make the quantum leap into the New Year and the new cycle filled with awakened potential it’s essential to release these in the next few weeks. A 2016 releasing ceremony is the perfect way to weeks to round off the energetic cycle of 2016 and make the transition into 2017.

release ritual

2016: End Of A Cycle

 

2016 is the final year in a nine year cycle of growth. As it winds down spend time to acknowledge how far you’ve come over the last 9 years; reflect on your lessons and new awareness; embrace wisdom gained and re-remembered and be GRATEFUL for all the joyous moments in your life.

Many people start off their New Year by making a list of resolutions. Many also don’t reach any of their goals. Often they make the same resolution year after year without achieving it!

Trying to set achievable goals to reach your dreams without first firming a solid foundation is like building a home over a sink-hole. Without firm footings it will collapse. The footings you need in order to create achievable goals are found by getting really clear about where you’re starting out from. The 2016  Releasing Ceremony does just that by highlighting both the journey you traveled and the lessons and achievements you encountered along way.

2016 has been a difficult year for many. It was filled with difficult challenges that provided great opportunity for personal development and spiritual growth. Many of these challenges revisited familiar life lessons. Lessons that repeat over and over, spiraling back upon themselves. Each revisit brings a variation of the core lesson providing the opportunity to reach a deeper awareness of both the lesson and yourself.

Coming at the end of a nine year cycle the lessons of 2016 are the culmination of this spiraling awareness and deepening consciousness. It’s essential to now finalise them or they will be carried into the new nine year cycle to be repeated yet again.

Bear in mind that the significant aspects of 2016 will be those that bring these nine year long lessons to culmination.

Are you enjoying this article? Read more to discover the 11 steps to create your own release ritual…

 

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Sick Or Healthy: It’s In Your Thoughts

Your thoughts can have a huge impact on your health. The human mind is the most powerful supercomputer in the world. It controls all the functions of your body, your behaviour, and your emotions. But your mind doesn’t necessarily control you, and recent research shows that you have the power to control your mind. The secret lies in the way you think because thoughts affect health. It turns out the power of positive thought may be stronger than we thought, and it can be harnessed to create health and wellbeing. The way you think can either make you sick or it can make you healthy. 

Watch your thoughts, they affect your health

 

IMPACT OF THOUGHTS

How we think determines how we speak and what we talk about which then impacts how we feel. Every decision, choice and action we make is influenced by how we feel.

Studies have shown that mindsets can change us in ways we had not imagined possible. So science is now asking if mindsets can change us, can we then deliberately choose our mindsets to improve our abilities. And the answer appears to be yes.

The cells in your body react to your thinking. Your thoughts can literally change your health by altering the cells and how they function. Every thought you have causes neurochemical changes within your brain and these can either help or harm you.

 

THOUGHTS AFFECT HEALTH

Your thoughts can alter your performance. They can alter your engagement and enjoyment of life. They can even alter your energetic body.

This really is a case of mind over matter.

Studies have produced much evidence that the way we think can create or change real-life physical and mental outcomes.

It’s been shown that our expectations can change brain chemistry and circuitry. This results in cognitive and physiological changes such as reduced anxiety, elevated hormone levels, or lower immune system reactions. Thoughts alone can improve our vision, weight loss, fitness, fatigue level, and can even stop allergic skin reactions.

Essentially your brain is shaped by your thoughts. And apparently your health and wellbeing is too.

 

THE PLACEBO EFFECT

Dr Lissa Rankin MD conducted extensive research and became completely convinced that a combination of positive belief and nurturing care activates the body’s natural self-repair mechanisms and helps the body heal itself. “The medical establishment has been proving that the mins can heal the body for over 50 years. We call it ‘the placebo effect‘”, she says.

But as she explains in her book Mind Over Medicine: Scientific Proof That You Can Heal Yourself the opposite is also true. Negative beliefs you hold about your health and harsh insensitive treatment by the health care system can poison your body.

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Power Of A Gratitude Attitude

The practice of gratitude as a tool for creating happiness has been mainstream for years. Long-term studies support the effectiveness and benefits of gratitude practice suggesting that a positive, appreciative attitude contributes to greater success in work, greater health, peak performance in sports and business, a higher sense of well-being, and a faster rate of recovery from surgery. The power of a gratitude practice is substantial.

power of gratitude attitude

But while we may acknowledge gratitude’s many benefits, its practice can be difficult to sustain. So many of us are trained to notice what is broken, undone or lacking in our lives. And for gratitude to meet its full healing potential, it needs to become more than just an empty word that is tossed around occasionally. We have to learn a new way of looking at things, a new habit, a whole new outlook on our life. And that can take some time.

That’s why practicing gratitude makes so much sense. When we practice giving thanks for all we have, instead of complaining about what we lack, we give ourselves the chance to see all of life as an opportunity and a blessing.

Remember that gratitude isn’t a blindly optimistic approach in which the bad things in life are whitewashed or ignored. It’s more a matter of where we put our focus and attention. Pain and injustice exist in this world, but when we focus on the gifts of life, we gain a feeling of well-being. Gratitude balances us and gives us hope.

There are many things to be grateful for: early spring flowers, legs that walk, friends who listen and really hear, chocolate, fresh eggs, warm cosy jackets, ripe tomatoes, clean air, the ability to read, roses, our health, butterflies. What’s on your list?

 

Some Ways to Practice Gratitude

Keep a gratitude journal in which you list things for which you are thankful. You can make daily, weekly or monthly lists. Greater frequency may be better for creating a new habit, but just keeping that journal where you can see it will remind you to think in a grateful way. It helps you to look past the problem in a situation to find the blessing in everything, even if that blessing is a difficult lesson.

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Is Your Life In Balance? Take The Quiz

If trying to maintain balance in your life makes you feel like a tightrope walker, you’re not alone. Most of us have so many demands on our time and energy life can feel like a three-ring circus.
Balance has become just another thing we desire but believe we can only have once we’ve  earned it, through overwork or overwhelm.

Is your life in balance

Finding balance across our life, whether it’s in work/life, caregiving/self care, routine/creativity or a host of other areas, can feel more and more out of reach and elusive with every passing day. Many people feel life just isn’t delivering all it promised. They can feel let down, unhappy and in some cases, even bitter.

But you can find balance right now. Once you make the decision that you’re worth it, you open yourself to the changes you need to make in your beliefs and practices to support you and allow you to once again find joy through the creation of balance.

 

True Or False?

Take this quiz to see how well you are meeting responsibilities while at the same time recognizing and fulfilling your personal needs and wants.

How well do these statements match you…are they true for you or false?

1. The only way I can successfully manage my life is to take care of myself physically and emotionally.

2. Nurturing myself increases my capacity to help others.

3. I eat healthfully.

4. I exercise regularly.

5. I get check-ups, go to the dentist, and take preventative precautions to prevent illness.

6. I set aside personal, quiet time for myself, whether I’m meditating or simply letting my thoughts drift.

7. I experience the gifts of each season: walking in the rain, cosy fires, bundled-up beach walks; gardening, hiking, more time outside, smelling the roses; camping, swimming, barbeques, walking barefoot on the earth; harvesting the bounty, gathering wood, spending more time inside, walking in the mist.

8. Creativity nurtures me. I do what I love, whether that’s cooking, drawing, painting, writing, dancing, singing or any other creative pursuit.

9. Cleaning out the old makes way for the new. I recognise when things and attitudes no longer serve me and regularly declutter the old and outdated in my life for a lightness and clarity.

10. Reaching out to others enriches my life. I spend quality time with family and friends.

11. Contributing to the world provides connection and purpose, so I give my time, energy and experience where it is most useful.

12. I notice and heed the emotional signals that tell me I’m out of balance: irritability, overwhelm, resentment.

13. If I feel that I’m catching a cold, I realize I may have stressed my immune system with overdoing things, so I stop and take care of myself.

14. When I need or want to, I say no to requests for my time.

15. I acknowledge my successes, no matter how small. I give myself permission to feel proud of all my achievements.

16. I listen to and honor the requests my body makes for such things as a nap, a walk, green vegetables, hot soup, time out.

17. Gratitude practices build inner strength and resilience to help me bounce back from stress. I remind myself every day of just how fortunate I am and of all the bounty and wonderful people in my life.

18. If I have something planned for myself, I don’t just toss that aside when someone makes a request of me.

19. I’m busy, but I find time to do the things I want to do.

20. I’m happy. I regularly experience well-being, contentment, even joy.

If you answered false more often than true you may want to make changes in your life to support you. After all, burn-out often leads to serious health problems ranging from aches and pains, through adrenal fatigue to depression plus many, many more.

Even the smallest child knows the frustration of having no time for activities that make you feel alive, that fire your joy and passion, that nurture you so you feel needed and special. Don’t wait until sickness strikes to change your life practices for the better.

Take a close look at those questions to which you answered false. Is there a pattern? Is it just one area of your life that’s impacting on your wellbeing and sense of balance?  Do you have strong boundaries? Consider or meditate on how you can incorporate the message into your life. And please, don’t hesitate to call if you’d like to explore this issue further.

So go ahead…consider yourself!

How balanced are you? Take the quiz

Author’s content used with permission, © Claire Communications

28 Awesome Ways To Rebalance, Revitalise And Renew

Do you feel burned out, run down, and exhausted? That’s no way to enter a New Year! 2015 has been a tough year for many, many people and it’s important to regroup and recharge as we roll on towards the year-end. Because I want to help you stay ahead of your game I’ve put together this list of ways to rebalance and revitalise body, mind and soul so you can be your renewed best, ready for any challenges the New Year throws at you.

28 ways to rebalance, revitalise & renew you

 

 

Revitalising yourself has much to do with releasing what no longer serves you and many of these practices involve letting go of the old. With the year drawing to a close it’s the perfect way to say goodbye to the old and make space for all the future holds for you.

 

REVITALISE YOUR MIND

revitalise your mind

1. Know Your Limits And Set Boundaries

Whether you’re someone who’s driven by a burning passion or like me, fired by curiosity always jumping to the next intrigue, you need to set your boundaries. Establishing boundaries isn’t about limitation. It’s not only to ensure your adrenal glands don’t give up from over-stress, and it’s not about conserving physical energy. Rather it’s about giving you the space and energy to spend more time pursuing those parts of your life that give you joy. When you have strong boundaries you can keep right away from others dramas.

2. Forgive, Forgive, Forgive

This is so important. Perhaps the most important step you need to take to revitalize your forgive and let gomind as well as your soul is to let go. If you’ve been hurt by someone in the past and are still carrying that heavy, painful, angry burden it’s now time to release it. Even if they’re not aware they hurt you it’s time to forgive. It’s not about negating what happened, but about you releasing the weight and the toxic, destructive impact anger and resentment have on your body and your soul.

3. Meditate

There’s absolutely no question about the benefits of meditating – studies just keep underscoring the many ways it benefits your health and wellbeing. Whether you snatch five minutes in the morning, adopt mindfulness through the day or join a meditation class, it’s simply a matter of finding the form that’s right for you and then sticking to it.

4. Build Better Relationships

It’s vital to get out of toxic relationships as they cloud your life with negativity. If you feel it’s too drastic to release them completely start small and schedule a day or a weekend free from all the negative people who drain you – even if you love them. Include anyone who’s quick to criticize or totally self-absorbed.

5. Get Creative

When you’re completely absorbed expressing yourself creatively just for fun, whether it’s singing, painting, sewing, gardening or whatever, it’s really difficult NOT to relax and stop stressing

6. Expand Your Experience

Challenge yourself by setting a date with get out of your comfort zonejust you to do something outside your comfort zone. Spend time alone discovering your capabilities. Find something that challenges you like hot air ballooning, scuba diving, attending a gallery, or even public speaking. When you challenge yourself you discover how capable you are. You may even find a new interest.

7. De-clutter Your Space To De-clutter Your Mind

Clean out the old and make way for the new. And that applies whether it’s material possessions, outdated attitudes or even people. The amazing thing is that when you start to de-clutter on any one level it flows through into all levels of you, the physical, emotional and spiritual. After you clear out the living room you’ll find your thoughts shifting and you may even look at the people in your life with new clearer vision.

 

REVITALISE YOUR EMOTIONS

revitalise your emotions

8. Give Back

Volunteer – your time, your knowledge or your support. Volunteer at a food truck, a shelter, or anywhere you are reminded of all the blessings you have in your life.

9. Be Present

Set aside some time each day for a thought diet. Limit your thoughts to the here and now, focusing only on the present. Forget the past and let the future unfold in it’s own time.

10. Count Your Successes

We can be quick to criticize our failings but often completely overlook our successes. Give yourself permission to feel proud of ALL your achievements, no matter how small.

11. Cry And Release

If you need to let it all out! cry, and release emotional hurt as well as toxins from your cellsRun a warm deep bath, add some Epsom salts and essential oils and soak. Cry out all the burdens of the last twelve months. Let it all flow until you feel relaxed, lighter and more positive. Emotional crying releases toxins that are byproducts of stress so your body will be cleaner and lighter too.

12. Create a Worry Time Window

If you’re someone who worries chances are it keeps you awake at night and stops you enjoying life to the full. Setting aside ten to thirty minutes each morning or night for just “worrying” frees you up for the rest of the day. When you find yourself starting to worry outside this time put the thought aside to revisit at the designated “worry window” time.

13. Be Honest

Lying to others doesn’t honour them or you. Allow yourself the gift of honest thoughts and communication with others. Having to keep up a lie is a heavy burden to carry.

14. Special “Me-Time” Alone

Time spent with just you is pure gold. Learning to say “no” to others and making space for yourself in your busy life provides an opportunity to heal and revitalize. It not only helps you connect with your inner wisdom more deeply, it also recharges you. Make time for yourself.

 

REVITALISE YOUR BODY

revitalise your body

15. Get Outside and Ground Yourself

Go outside, take off your shoes and sit or stand on the earth, the grass or in the water to ground yourself. Just being in nature lifts your spirits. Our modern environment has a toxic effect on your body and directly connecting your body to the earth through your feet creates a chemical reaction within your cells that helps rebalance you. Focus on being present and breathe deeply to oxygenate your blood and fire up your brain cells.

16. Simple New Year Detox

Instead of vaguely vowing on January 1st to “lose weight”, “eat healthy” or “exercise more”, do a mini detox to help you quickly recover from too many festivities. Set aside a day, weekend, even a week to take a break from alcohol, processed foods and sugar. Plan ahead. Get in fresh fruit and veges, wholefoods or minimally processed foods, or even go totally organic. Drink lots of pure water to flush out the ‘nasties’. Add warm lemon water in the morning. Do whatever you can manage. You’ll feel clearer with more energy.

17. Reset Your Sleep Clock

Adults need 7 to 8 hours sleep every night. Having a sleep-in on the weekend doesn’t balance your sleep bank. When you’re chronically sleep deprived your brain stops getting the ‘tired’ messages so you’re not even aware any longer that you need sleep. If you’re not getting at least 7 hours sleep a night your brain needs retraining.

18. Get Physical

Research shows we need physical exercise every day. It could be weights, running or a gym workout. Or instead you could do gardening, walking, swimming, tai chi, rope skipping or any other activity you enjoy. I have a really, really long hallway and I love reading. So when the weather’s foul I walk briskly up and down the hall for 30 minutes, reading all the way. Just get active!

19. Love The Sunmake a daily date with the sun

Make a daily date with the sun. Not only does it brighten your outlook it also provides you with vitamin D. It’s the only natural source of this essential building block which is required for hundreds of functions in your body.

20. Drink Up

Carry a bottle of water with you and sip through the day. You’ll be surprised at how much you manage to drink. Surprisingly when you’re chronically dehydrated your brain mixes up the messages it gets from your cells and tells you “you’re hungry, go eat” instead of “go drink”. Also too many substitute coffee, tea or soft drinks for water, which act as diuretics and deplete your body of moisture.

21. Eat A Rainbow

Who doesn’t love a rainbow? eat a rainbowThe colour of fruit and vegetables tells you what it contains. It’s not enough to have one or two, you need the full range. So aim for five or more different colours on your plate to get a broader range of antioxidants.

 

REVITALISE YOUR SOUL

revitalise your soul

22. Practice Gratitude

Remind yourself of just how fortunate you are and of all the bounty in your life. Keep a Gratitude Journal to record three things you are thankful for each day, no matter how small.

23. Evict Your Inner Critic

We’ve all got one, that voice inside our head that’s so quick to point out all the holes in our silence your inner criticplans, to warn us we don’t have what it takes to succeed and to remind us of our past mistakes and failures. I used to call mine “The Committee” because sometimes it felt like a whole group ganged up together to completely overpower me. But you can evict them. If you’re a gentle person bribe that inner critic outside your head, or explain nicely that you’re the boss and have the final word. If you’re a bit blunter you could do as I did. Whenever that “Committee” started criticising I’d jump in with “sit down and shut up” before they could get going. It’s amazing how quickly you can silence the critic simply by deciding that YOU’RE the one in the driver seat who makes all the final decisions.

 

24. Release Guilt

Guilt is simply homework from your Inner Critic. When you reclaim control from the critic you don’t have to carry the guilt either. Write down what you feel guilty about, the whole story if you want, and finish it with “I forgive you” (that part’s really important). Next read it out loud. Lastly burn the paper. The three steps of this small ritual each plays an important role. By writing you crystallize the issue, including your forgiveness of yourself. Speaking the words out loud empowers them. Burning the paper symbolically releases your guilt.

25. Listen With Your Whole Self

Open yourself to someone trying to tell you something, and listen without any judgement and without giving advice. Don’t relate what they say to your own experiences. In fact just listen, nothing more – unless they ask for your thoughts. Listening without engaging your inner critic or your life story is one of the greatest gifts you can give and nourishes your soul.

26. Give, And Wish For Nothing In Return

Cultivate generosity. Giving enriches somebody else’s life. Giving without expecting anything in return also equals deposits in your happiness bank. Passing it forward is one simple way to give. Check The Wake Up Project for mindful living tips, uplifting kindness stories and free kindness cards.

27. Gain Clarity By Connecting With Inner Wisdom

Taking time to meditate or pray connect to your inner wisdom to get clarityor any practice that connects with your inner wisdom and develops your spirituality is an investment in defining your purpose and passion. Your inner wisdom is like the GPS for your life and provides you with guidance and clarity about who you are and your life path.

28. Ditch “Rule” Words

Words like should, must, don’t or can’t are all ‘rule words’ that indicate somebody else’s expectation of you. Ditch rules set by others that contain any of these or similar words. When you set new standards that honour your needs and rights you reinforce your personal boundaries.

What other methods do you use to recharge and revitalise yourself?

 

Disclaimer

All information and opinions presented here are for information purposes only and are not intended as a substitute for professional advice offered during a consultation. Please consult with your health care provider before following any of the treatment suggested on this site, particularly if you have an ongoing health issue.

Source articles

Gratitude. Generosity. Growth.

Is your life happy? Do you remember to enjoy the small things in life? Do you express your gratitude every day?

In order to live a healthy happy life requires you to address all aspects of your life and surroundings. You need to go much further than just getting fit or changing what you eat. Obviously fitness and diet develop the physical body. But they also develop the mental and emotional bodies to a degree through the endorphins released through exercise, and by creating a better chemical balance in the brain through good food choices.

gratitude generosity growth

 

The mind-body connection is well recognized and it’s known your emotional state affects how healthy your body is.

Holistic growth involves changing and improving on all levels – spiritually as well as physically and mentally. It requires you to be constantly aware and willing to make changes in attitudes, to practice mindfulness, to cultivate gratitude and to open your heart with generosity.

To develop your spirituality you don’t need to follow a religion although you can if you prefer. But you do need to develop a close and meaningful relationship with your essential inner self. You could go and undertake something quite life-changing such as Vipassana to achieve this, but often it’s by simply looking at the things in your life differently that you create the biggest impact, and you can do this in small ways every day.

Becoming connected to the world directly around you in a positive and meaningful way can create a snowballing effect that leads to big changes within. By developing and practicing this you also show love and care for yourselves. You can do this by:

  • showing love and care for the Earth in your own neighbourhood
  • appreciating the small gestures of those you cross paths with
  • acknowledging when things fall into place smoothly
  • actually noticing what is going on around you

The Key

The key to achieving these grass root changes is in the cultivation of gratitude, which results in you becoming more generous, which then leads to personal awareness and growth. What a great chain of events!

Gratitude is a funny thing. We are all taught to say please and thank you but not often how to feel and express gratitude for our life.

I remember teaching this basic social grace to my son when he was 3 years old. As he and his little friend were exchanging Christmas gifts the boys were told to “shake hands” to show gratitude and thanks. They looked at each other bewildered for a moment and then both started shaking their hands wildly in the air around themselves.

But gratitude is not just about saying thank you for a gift (whether you like it or not). It’s about finding joy in the detail of your life and bringing the focus of your life back to the minutiae around you.

It’s about bringing an awareness of the continual flow of life and a development of a sense of your connection to all, within.

It’s about recognizing all the blessings that are a part of each day, the blessings that often get lost in the daily humdrum.

Gratitude’s about finding joy in the detail of your life.

Gratitude is about learning to find joy in the detail of your life
Gratitude’s about finding joy in the detail of life

 

Living In The Moment

When exactly is it we first become focused on “keeping your eye on the prize”? I see this as the single most important attitude that undermines the practice of gratitude. We spend our life focused on achieving the promotion, the dream house, cool car, we follow fashion which changes so fast we constantly need more new garments, we work towards the next holiday, beautiful jewelry and on and on and on.

We’re driven by never-ending striving for what we need to achieve and own, our eyes constantly focused on what’s up ahead, the big prize.

When we live with this focus we miss the life around us, the little details of our everyday life…we fail to ever live in the moment.

Living in the moment is what we’ve been told to do in order to know, understand and improve ourselves, but we’re never in the space to achieve it.

By cultivating gratitude and forcing yourself to bring your focus back from what you desire or want to achieve you start to notice the small things around you, and to find ways to give back to the earth as well as to the people in your life.

By cultivating gratitude you also cultivate generosity.

Gratitude Journal

One way to begin cultivating gratitude is to start a gratitude journal.

 

Like to know more about keeping a gratitude journal and the benefits of gratitude?

Continue reading…

 

 

 

Disclaimer.

All information and opinions presented here are for information purposes only and are not intended as a substitute for professional advice offered during a consultation. Please consult with your health care provider before following any of the treatment suggested on this site, particularly if you have an ongoing health issue. 

 

Related articles

 

Clear Your Crap For Clarity And Control

So many people feel overwhelmed today, and stumble through their life trying to stay a-top the wave of obligation and busyness, without falling and crashing. Just staying up there requires energy and effort. Getting rid of stuff can help clear some space in your life and your head to make that balancing act just a little easier.

As life continues to speed up the feeling that we need to simplify, if only to stay on top and survive, is expanding and gaining importance. De-cluttering is often the first step towards a simpler life. The beauty of clearing out the junk in your life is that it’s not limited to just the old clothes you no longer wear but can be undertaken as a conscious project where you target clearing on every single level of your being.

Clear Your Crap

Everyone is familiar with spring cleaning but not so many set themselves up to undertake the “whole enchilada”, to declutter more than just their possessions. When you begin to view de-cluttering as a “life-cleanse” rather than as simply a bit of a clean-out you set yourself on a path for a cascade of dynamic life-changing effects.

Everyone has stuff in their life that no longer serves them, baggage that no longer supports them to be the best they can be. Sad to say this outdated stuff can even include people.

To do a full de-clutter of your life really takes some hard soul-searching. In order to totally renew ourselves on every level we need to clear not just belongings but also outdated or negative beliefs, debt, bad habits, people that who leave us feeling bad about ourselves, judgments and criticisms of self and others, or mental clutter.

For many of us holding onto excess possessions, thoughts, emotions or beliefs, has to do with our past experiences and what we learned as we grew up. Relationships, feelings of obligation, debt can all be tied tightly to emotions that are rooted deep in our early years, so they can sometimes be difficult to dislodge. Often we are not even conscious of where they arose from.

The process of life de-cluttering can seem a mammoth exercise. It can seem completely overwhelming and confusing. Where to actually begin could even stop you from starting.

But the same rules that apply to spring-cleaning also apply to making the total life clean out happen. Just as you start spring-cleaning in one room and work systematically through the whole house, so too do you start with one small part of your life and clear that first.

It is all about recognizing what needs to go and then breaking the huge challenge down into small steps that are easy to manage and succeed at.

The beliefs, habits, and possessions in our life can have a great hold on us and shifting them out of our life can be very challenging and difficult. Often by clearing out excess possessions in our life we create a ‘roll’ that then eases us into decluttering the trickier things.

By starting in our homes and removing the excess we open the way for a decluttering on all levels. We open the way for clarity and space not just in our surroundings but also in our mind, body and spirit. Once we declutter our possessions we can begin to recognize, examine and discard those more challenging things in our life, the mental clutter, debt, bad jobs, even relationships.

Often we can have a sense that we don’t really feel happy, or passionate about life. But we may not be able to pinpoint where the feeling stems from. Sometimes we have just become so caught up in living, juggling work, kids, friends, parents, money, plus all the other obligations of life, that we have lost sight of our own needs. The negatives in our life have been absorbed and become so ingrained that we don’t even notice them as being less than ideal anymore.

I like to think of these outdated rose-and-pearlparts of our life as the grain of sand in the oyster shell. The sand grain sits there irritating the poor oyster. But with work the oyster is able to transform it into a beautiful gem, a pearl. By opening up the shell of ourselves and working on the irritating grains of sand in our life we can transform problems into pearls.

 

When we de-clutter we learn to let go and create space. There is a saying that if we want something new in our life we need to first make a space for it to fit in. With our life becoming even fuller and more challenging every single day it seems imperative that we clear every aspect of it that we can. New things will always move into our life, it is the nature of living, but whether we have the space in our life to embrace the positive that waits to arrive depends on whether we are prepared to release the negative first.

As we declutter we gain a sense of lightness as each non-supportive thing leaves
us for good. These are heavy burdens and releasing them lifts the weight from our shoulders giving us a sense of freedom.

Whether the clutter in our life is physical, emotional, or mental it takes a good deal of effort to maintain our relationship with them. When we own less we need to devote less attention to stuff and so we gain the precious commodity of time.

To begin your declutter start by drawing up a plan. Don’t worry if everything isn’t included. Things that need to good will become apparent as you go ahead. Start simply with releasing the most obvious things. Break the process down into small steps and tackle one at a time, then move on to the next. Stop along the way to acknowledge what you have cleared and pause to notice if more stuff has arisen.

If you need help to get clarity about where to begin, or help to form a plan of action, or you know you’ll be able to do this if you just have the support to keep you on track, I am here to help.

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Disclaimer

All information and opinions presented here are for information purposes only and are not intended as a substitute for professional advice offered during a consultation. Please consult with your health care provider before following any of the treatment suggested on this site, particularly if you have an ongoing health issue.

Find Control In Your Life – Step By Small Step

Sometimes we get so set in our habits it becomes impossible to think about changing them even if doing so means taking back control in your life. Often the route to changing set habits seems too tough to even begin. That’s where process becomes vital. A plan that breaks down the insurmountable changes you need to make into small easy steps is invaluable as it makes those changes easily achievable.

When my son was in his first year of University he visited his Naturopath for some health issue. Hardly surprisingly the naturopath called him out on his eating habits, asking why he ate junk, specifically McDonalds, for his lunch when his Uni was surrounded by great little Asian cafes where he could go and get a big bowl of broccoli instead.

My son came home and told me he’d been told to eat broccoli for lunch. He laughed a lot, said “Yea right! As if (that’s ever going to happen)” and for him that was end of possiblity to change. Totally normal response from an eighteen year old I thought.

 

find clarity and control in your life

Telling a guy of this age to replace all his delicious (to him) foods with another food that he didn’t love, was like speaking to closed ears. For him the cost and the task were both simply too big. He wasn’t prepared to give up his foods because he loved them. He coudn’t find a good motivation as he wasn’t really convinced enough that his poor diet was contributing to his symptoms, in spite of what his naturopath and I told him. He didn’t see the benefit, better health, as big enough a compensation for the loss of a practice he loved.

So we talked, and I gently nagged, and he ended up agreeing once a week to try out the nearby cafes and let me know if there were any worth visiting. Plus I suggested he modified the instructions a little to make it easier and less of a chore.

The prospect of steamed broccoli for lunch five days a week didn’t cut it with him. But when I broke it down into small steps by suggesting he try it just once a week the task was immediately manageable. He no longer saw it as an imposition as he actually really liked the new foods offered.

When I modified it to something less extreme than a bowl of broccoli, and made the change smaller, it was far more appealing to him, and better than the junk food healthwise. In fact he came to enjoy the variety.

Changing habits is never easy to do especially when they are ones you really enjoy. When you focus on the deprivation that’s involved, of how much you’ll miss out on if you drop or change the habit, any benefits can become difficult to see, and without obvious benefits there’s no incentive for you to do it.

The other big problem that often stops you before we even start changing your habits is the actual logistics involved. Sometimes the organisation required to make change becomes so huge it seems insurmountable. While there must first be enough motivation for you to put in the effort, the steps to get there must be designed so it’s actually easy to manage them.

In my son’s case he not only thought he’d miss out on something he loved, but he also had to consider the issues or steps involved in deciding which café to go to before he’d commit to doing it – which ones he could afford, which would have quick service to fit into his lunch break, which menu looked better, and perhaps most importantly whether his friends would also change so he didn’t need to eat alone. The last of these was a ‘maker or a breaker’. If his friends had stayed with the junk food option the steps to change would have been insurmountable in his assessment and he would have dropped the idea before starting it.

One simple way to overcome the apparent looming difficulty of making change is to break the goal down.

I take the attitude that by changing just that one meal a week my son was 20 percent healthier than he was before. And it opened the way to eating healthier because once he started he found he enjoyed it as much as the junk. This made it easier to replace more and more meals with healthier options.

This is a tactic I often suggest to clients. Most of them love their coffee but often coffee contributes to their ill-health. If I ask them to stop drinking coffee they often agree reluctantly but don’t actually make any change, and sometimes even don’t tell me they still drink just as much.

But if they only have to cut their coffee back from say four cups a day to three the task is much more achievable, and they start to see benefits immediately. They’re already doing 25 percent better than they were, so are that much further towards their goal of good health.

Many times when you just don’t ‘feel the joy’ it’s normal to want to change your life. But if you are so busy focusing on the end point where your life would be totally happy, blissful and perfect, that place where you are in control of your life, the road to get there appears simply too long and difficult. The steps you need to take seem too big, especially if they involve juggling many other responsibilities in your life to manage.

Breaking everything into small steps is the easiest way to bring change, to allow you to take a gentler pathway to that goal you have. It also provides an easy confirmation that things are starting to change and you are achieving what it is you want.

When I want to make changes I first break the task down into small steps. Then to I go back through it and break it down again, taking it right down into tiny little steps. There are days when my steps might include one so basic as getting up and going outside. When I get there I can feel the satisfaction that I have been able to drag myself away from my work so I have a sense of achievement that reminds me “I can do this”.

The steps you take don’t have to be major in themself, they simply need to be defined and achievable. They reinforce your knowledge that you can make the change you need. Each and every one needs to be acknowledged right when it’s achieved. And most importantly each one will allow you that feeling that you again have some control in your life.

So what is it you want to change first? Take another look at where you can break it down into those tiny little, easily attainable steps. Then begin, one confident step at a time on the pathway towards your goal.

 

find control in your life

Disclaimer

All information and opinions presented here are for information purposes only and are not intended as a substitute for professional advice offered during a consultation. Please consult with your health care provider before following any of the treatment suggested on this site, particularly if you have an ongoing health issue.

 

Are you Happy? How Do You Rate?

Are you a happy person? Happiness is a matter of choice — not just luck.

How often have you thought of someone as simply having a happy disposition? The truth is that happiness doesn’t just fall into your lap, rather it is something you need to consciously work at. Chances are that person with the happy disposition consciously makes life choices to create that feeling, every day.

 

happy person

 

For some people this comes easier than for others, but everyone can choose to be happy and then to take the steps to make it happen. Just by changing habits in their life for ones that create more happiness they can shift themself towards the happier life they crave.

Happiness is not something that occurs all the time. Life is a series of ups and downs. Rather, being a happy person indicates that you are able to bring yourself back into that lighter state when you find yourself falling into darker moods.

 

Use this checklist to find out how happy you are.

Happy people:

  1. Nurture social relationships and spend time in-person with their friends
  2. Live minimally
  3. Tell the truth
  4. Don’t judge
  5. Don’t hold grudges
  6. Never make excuses
  7. Take the time to listen
  8. Speak well of others
  9. Choose their friends with care
  10. Set their personal boundaries
  11. Dream big
  12. Avoid social comparisons
  13. Treat everyone with kindness
  14. Accept others
  15. Exercise
  16. Don’t sweat the small stuff
  17. Accept what they cannot change
  18. Meditate or practice quiet reflection
  19. Avoid seeking approval from others
  20. Express gratitude for what they already have in their life
  21. Eat well
  22. Laugh and have a sense of fun
  23. Are busy but not rushed
  24. Give – but not until it hurts
  25. Surround themselves with other happy people

 

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So just how happy are you?

If you didn’t rate so highly try adopting some of the practices on this list.

Start with just one or two and do them until they become a natural way for you to act or think. Then gradually add some more. As you increase your happy practices it becomes easier to add more and more, and you will find you feel happy most of the time.

What makes you feel really deeply happy? Why not leave a reply below?

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Disclaimer
All information and opinions presented here are for information purposes only and are not intended as a substitute for professional advice offered during a consultation. Please consult with your health care provider before following any of the treatment suggested on this site, particularly if you have an ongoing health issue.