I’ve got something that might blow your mind. You know how we always feel like we’re running out of time? Like we have too much on our plate and not enough hours in the day? Like we’re constantly chasing deadlines, appointments, goals, and dreams, but never really enjoying the journey?

Well, what if I told you that time is not a fixed thing, but a flexible one? That you can actually change your relationship with time and make it work for you, not against you? That you can slow down, breathe, and savour every moment of your life, without feeling guilty or stressed?

Sounds too good to be true, right?

But it’s not. It’s possible.

And I’m going to show you how.

First of all, let me ask you this: If time were an animal, what kind would it be? A cheetah? A shark? A hummingbird? A snail?

Well, for most of us, it would probably be on the endangered species list. Or that’s how it seems: Too much to do, too many places to be, too little time to do it. We feel like we’re imprisoned by our perception of time as a scarce and limited resource. We rush from one commitment to another, believe we don’t have a minute to spare, yearn for more time, and feel anxious and guilty when we’re idle.

Is this how life is supposed to be?

No! Nor does it have to be.

The truth is, time is not something that happens to us. It’s something that we create. It’s a mental construct that we can shape and mould according to our needs and desires.

But until we change our relationship with time our lives will continue to speed away from us – at enormous cost to our health and our experience of ourselves and the world around us.

There’s no issue, no aspect of human life, that exceeds this in importance. As Jacob Needleman once said, “The destruction of time is literally the destruction of life”.

So how do we change our relationship with time? How do we make it our friend, not our enemy? How do we reclaim our power over it and use it wisely and joyfully?

Well, there are many ways to do that, but here are some of the most effective ones I’ve found:

Pause

This is a simple but powerful technique that can help you break the cycle of hurry and stress. It’s inspired by the Buddhist monk Thich Nhat Hanh who suggested we “take a deep breath before answering the phone”. The idea is to create conscious pauses throughout the day – a moment of silence before a meal, a few minutes of sitting in the car before entering the house after work – in order to “come home” to ourselves.

Conscious pauses help us to reconnect with our body, our breath, our feelings, and our intentions; to slow down and appreciate the present moment. They help us to remember what matters most.

“Nature requires us not only to be able to work well, but also to idle well”

Aristotle

Carve Out Idle Time Alone

This might sound counterintuitive, but sometimes the best way to get more done is to do less. Or better yet, to do nothing at all. Aristotle said that “nature requires us not only to be able to work well, but also to idle well.” Just because you’re not doing anything doesn’t mean that nothing’s getting done! On the contrary, it means that we’re giving ourselves space and time to relax, recharge, reflect, and create. We’re letting go of the external demands and expectations and listening to our inner voice. We give ourselves the space to explore our thoughts, feelings, dreams, and passions. This creates room for us to tap into our intuition and creativity. It opens the way to discover new possibilities and opportunities.

Live Fully in the Present Moment

One of the main reasons we feel like we don’t have enough time is because we’re not really here. We’re either dwelling on the past or worrying about the future. We’re missing out on the beauty and richness of the now, the only time that we actually have. The only time that matters. The only time that we can influence and enjoy. So why not make the most of it? Why not leave behind the thoughts of what was or what will be, and focus on what is? Why not experience time more peacefully and joyfully by being fully present and aware of ourselves and our surroundings?

Toss Out Your Schedule Wherever You Can

Don’t get me wrong, having a schedule can be useful and helpful. It helps us organise our time and prioritise our tasks. It can also keep us focused to stay on track and achieve our goals. But sometimes, having a schedule can also be limiting and stressful. It can make us feel like we’re trapped in a rigid routine that doesn’t allow for any spontaneity or flexibility. We can even end up feeling like we’re slaves to the clock rather than masters of our own time.

So why not try something different once in a while? Why not schedule some spontaneous time and surprise yourself? Why not follow your impulses and instincts rather than your plans and agendas? Take a risk and see what happens when you let go of control and embrace uncertainty.

Explore the Underlying Reasons for Your Busyness

Sometimes, we’re busy because we have to be. Because we have responsibilities and obligations that we can’t ignore or avoid. Or we have goals and dreams that we want to pursue and achieve. But sometimes, we’re simply busy because we want to be. Because we’re afraid of what would happen if we weren’t. We fill up our time because we’re avoiding emotions that we don’t want to face or questions that we don’t want to answer.

Consider what you are running from. What are you hiding from? Is there something you are afraid of? What do you really want? These are some of the questions that you need to ask yourself if you want to understand and change your relationship with time.

Doing this emotional work might be challenging, but it’s essential if you want to stop running from your heart and start living from your soul.

Play

Remember when you were a kid and you used to play for hours without any worries or cares? Can you recall how time seemed to stand still or fly by depending on how much fun you were having? Remember how you felt alive, free, and happy? Well, guess what? You can still feel that way. You can still play. And you should. Because play is not just for children. It’s for everyone. Play is not only a natural and vital part of life. It’s a way of expressing ourselves, exploring our potential, connecting with others, and enjoying ourselves. Playing is a way of stepping outside time and entering a state of flow, where we’re fully immersed and engaged in what we’re doing.

So go ahead and play. Sing, dance, draw, write, cook, garden, paint, knit, build, invent, experiment, joke, laugh, smile, hug, kiss, cuddle, wrestle, tickle, shake your bootie – whatever makes you happy. Play helps us get outside time and inside ourselves.

Create Time Retreats

Sometimes, the best way to change our relationship with time is to change our environment and our routine. We all need to occasionally step out of our normal life and into a different one. When we create a time retreat, we can shift into a different rhythm and experience time in a new way. This doesn’t have to be expensive or complicated. It can be as simple as taking a day off from work and doing something that you love or something that you’ve never done before. Or it can be as elaborate as going on a vacation or a pilgrimage to a place that inspires you or challenges you. The point is to create some space and time for yourself where you can just “be” without the need to do anything or be anyone else.

Spend Time in Nature

One of the easiest and most effective ways to change our relationship with time is to spend more time in nature. Nature has its own pace and a rhythm that is unhurried and harmonious. it doesn’t rush or worry or stress. Nature just is. When we’re immersed in nature, we can learn to be like that too, shifting into our own calm, unhurried pace. We begin to slow down and sync up with the natural cycles of day and night, sun and moon, seasons and tides. As we come into alignment with nature, we begin to appreciate the beauty and wonder of the world around us. As we watch a bird or a flower or a cloud or a star time stretches out in our minds and hearts.

These are just some of the ways that we can change our relationship with time and make it more meaningful and fulfilling. There are many more that you can discover and try for yourself. The important thing is to start somewhere and see what works for you. See if your time reservoir refills as you allow yourself time to “breathe” in your life.

Remember: time is not your enemy. It’s your ally. It’s your gift. It’s your life. Don’t waste it. Don’t rush it. Don’t regret it. Cherish it. Enjoy it. Celebrate it.

DISCLAIMER

All information and opinions presented here are for information purposes only and are not intended as a substitute for professional advice. Do not use this article to diagnose a health condition. Speak to your doctor if you think your condition may be serious or before discontinuing any prescribed medication. Please consult with your health care provider before following any of the treatment suggested anywhere on this site, particularly if you have an ongoing health issue.